View Point
From an annonymous sender
I now can't believe it took so long to
actually break away from my marriage. The hardest
thing was to tell my family so each time I wanted to
walk away, I tried to put things back together...and
guess what.....My brothers words were "at last". The
rest of my (large) family were just too diplomatic to
say the same thing (and I was worried). The road is
not that easy, especially financially but I am
starting to re-enjoy life all over again.
There is always a better life for you to make for
yourself if you want it, it is not easy, but worth
it.
"HONESTY" from KIM
Be honest to your self as well as people around you. That
includes if you are going to hurt their feelings, because, if you don't,
pretty soon you will be lieing to everyone, and that is the greatest sin of
all!
THOUGHTS ON SINGLE PARENTHOOD
Something from Mike Atkins that is definitely worth reading.
I am delighted to see this page, and I really pray that you will prosper. I am a married parent and amidst the joys, I see the effort and stresses involved in raising a child, and wanting to do the best for them; so I have some feeling for the difficulties of single parents.
I would urge that you do not seek to glorify single-parenthood, but rather
to affirm and encourage those who find themselves in that position. I feel that single-parenthood is not desirable (as some women's magazines would tell us), but that single parents have an enormous responsibilty that requires much courage that others can only wonder at.
I will do whatever (little) that I can to advertise your site, and encourage people to offer you support.
God bless you!
WHAT MARRIAGE SHOULD BE
Taken from an interview with Dr Paul.(Hope he doesn't mind me using it here)
Your marriage and home are where you each should feel safe and supported, admired and respected. A place of enjoyment, where you are nurtured and encouraged to grow. You and your partner are a team against the outside world.
Compromise and co-operation are the most successful of human ventures. Marriage partners really need to understand the wishes and opinions of the other, so the couple can negotiate problematic issues with mutual understanding.
No marriage is carefree, there are good times and bad times. So, we need to tend our marriages like precious gardens, to harvest the prize, which is the sharing of sorrow and joy, triumph and disaster with that special someone you love above all; being assured that you are loved in return.
SURVIVAL STRATERGY FOR PERSONAL DISASTERS
One of JOHNS points of view.
When I take a look at my life to date, I find that there have been some truly momentous events that have changed me and my life drastically. Initially I viewed them as catastrophic, the end of the world. But guess what. I SURVIVED EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM (maybe a bit battered and injured, but definately still alive). It just seemed to take forever to recuperate to a semblance of normality. I started to ask myself questions. One of the most relevant was :- "Why did I waste so much time when I knew I would survive anyway. There is no point in crying over spilt milk. It has happened, and there is nothing you can do about it. So get on with your life, and learn from your mistakes." A great philosophy, but how do you pick yourself up quickly if all you want to do is die. Having thought on this for a while I started to change the way I viewed disasters. It may not work for you, but it sure helps me.
So here is MY SOLUTION :-
First point : The book of your life has already been written and in certain chapters bad things are going to happen to you no matter what.
Second point : There is a reason for these happenings, and the reason is that it will always lead to something better.
Third point : So when ever something bad happens in your life, always look for a POSITIVE SIDE, because there always is one. Even if it doesn't happen straight away you can be assured that something positive will come out of every bad situation. When you see the positive side in anything, life returns to normality a lot quicker. You are no longer looking at the past and being sad over it, but getting excited for the future and the good that you know will be happening to you.
The most important thing about this whole philosophy is "YOU HAVE THE CHOICE TO SEE THINGS ANY WAY YOU WANT TO. SO MAKE THE RIGHT CHOICE, AND LOOK FOR THE POSITIVE."
A DEFINITION OF A FAMILY
Another one of JOHNS views
Let me tell you about one of my dreams that was nearly destroyed.
My dream of a family. This includes a partner and children. A family to
me is the most important thing in the world. Not where you live, or what you eat and wear etc. but the people who make up that family unit. If you have a strong and
stable family with good moral values, it doesn't matter what happens in
the world around you, or what you do out there (as long as it doesn't
directly affect any member of the family), they will always be there for
you, in all ways. I distanced myself
from my family a long time ago (red sheep of the family), but I always new,
without ever having asked them, that no matter what I did, they would
always be there for me. And when I really needed them. THERE THEY WERE.
Helping me in which ever way they could, but especially emmotionally.
And that includes my brother and sister. I feel privilaged to belong to
a family like that. So when I got married, that was the type of family I
wanted to build (not how my folks did it, but with the same strength).
Unfortunately it didn't work. As you can imagine, my dream was very nearly destroyed. I've spent a long time putting it back together again and I still believe
that it is the way to go. I've been working on a slightly modified
version with my two boys. But my full dream is still there, and in tact, and I know that one day I will meet the right partner who will make this dream come true.
Submit your VIEW POINT HERE
You are the
visitor to have found this page!!